Why I’m choosing compassion and empathy over anger and (more) hate
News travels fast, and news on a Mediterranean island in the digital age travels even faster. So when the video of a non-fatal suicide attempt appeared on social media yesterday, it was a matter of minutes until it had reached streets, offices, and households.
I scrolled through my socials a few hours later, trying to understand why I was seeing screenshots from the same video and lengthy posts on my news feed. One central theme emerged: people were angry. Angry at the group of adults who could be seen standing by in the video, jeering at the man, encouraging him to move on with his attempt, and filming the entire ordeal.
Disgusting? Undoubtedly so.
Shocking? Social media seems to think so. I beg to differ.
You see, the thing with emotional and immediate reactions is that they serve to really bring out our true colours. The social media posts (or at least the ones that the algorithm showed me) were in the most part lengthy, attempting to reflect on what this incident says about Maltese society but instead serving as little more than mere passive condemnation. Most importantly, they were fuelled with disgust, anger, and in some cases even a form of hate towards the group of adults who had, by moral standards, behaved so irresponsibly in such a sensitive situation.
Yet that’s a little bit ironic, isn’t it? Condemning hate speech to defend one individual, while using a form of it (hate speech) to condemn a group of others. Perhaps it wasn’t intended as such. Perhaps it was an emotional and immediate reaction written in a state of shock. Yet it was out there, and it was prioritised above all other reflection which could have taken place.
I scrolled a bit more and tried to find at least one post — be it by individuals, political representatives or local organisations — that prioritised empathy and compassion. But these were not easy to find. The reaction of disgust prevailed above all else.
You see, I am no sociologist, but I know that at the very least, for a society to exist, the presence of a group of people is required. This group of people enters a form of agreement which asks them to abide by a set of values, norms, rules, and other elements. This collective fabric makes up society. So when one (or a group of us) fail to understand the value of that fabric, there is a problem for us all. Because when one of us fails, we all fail.
That group of adults need help as much as the individual who stood on the edge of a bastion yesterday. Somewhere along the way, we failed them as well and if, as a society, we do not collectively come together to acknowledge this, reflect and take action to change that reality, this will be nothing but a missed opportunity.
At the first instance, I too was angry. But then I found myself almost sharing that video and decided against it the minute I realised how this could be a trigger for others. Anger is needed, condemnation of wrongdoings is important. But it cannot stand alone.
So, I hear you ask, what could we have done better? My humble outlook (as a mere civilian and by no means a professional in the field) tells me that we could have chosen to balance out the impulsive voices of anger inside us. We could have dug a little deeper and looked for a more compassionate voice. We could have gone onto social media and shared support helplines (like the ones I have added below). We could have turned to our political leaders’ social media pages and found them taking active and realistic stands to prioritise mental health awareness and education concerning mental wellbeing. On a personal level, we could have phoned that friend who has been struggling with life and checked in with them.
It’s never too late. Anger, hate and passive condemnation are what enabled yesterday’s incident to exist. I’m choosing compassion, empathy, and education as a driving force going forward. How about you?
If you need emotional support, you can reach out:
Richmond Foundation support line: 1770
Crisis Resolution Malta: 99339966
FSWS support line: 179
If you or someone you know is in danger, please call the emergency helpline 112 (MALTA).
